“Hot alloy chrome wheels have a lot more to offer other than being chick magnets”
I have to admit, the suspense has been killing me. Ever since I stumbled upon this internet pearl of wisdom I have been looking forward to writing today’s post. Chrome wheels are Chick magnets? Learn something new every day. The owners of the Bad Ass Chrome Wheels website(1) may not be aware of the FTC or their rules pertaining to internet marketing(2). “Advertising must tell the truth and not mislead consumers. In addition, claims must be substantiated.” Then again, maybe they actually did the scientific research necessary to verify that claim. I imagine that process went something like this …… 
“Hey boss, I need a few thousand bucks to do some market research” “For what?” “Well, I want to find out if women are attracted to men who drive cars with chrome wheels. I am going to need to hire a couple of guys, rent some cars and put chrome wheels on one of them. Come to think of it I’d better hire twins just in case one guy is better looking than the other so we have that item controlled. And I need to go someplace where there are a lot of women. Got any ideas?” “How about Red Steagall’s Rodeo at the Stockyard in Fort Worth?” The pitch must have been approved because the research generated some further gems of knowledge such as chrome wheels are part of the hip-hop bling culture and they also impress girls. Which perfectly explains all the minivans with chrome wheels I see running around.
Bishop Limos in Portland Oregon
The internet can be entertaining or informative, and on rare occasion both. But sometimes you run into a piece of information that is so absurd, there must be some foundation in truth. The Bad Ass Chrome Wheel boys had this suggestion for the presidential limo “Obama’s gonna be sportin while he’s sittin’ on 30’s.” My first thought was that there’s no way anybody would put wheels like that on a limo but the picture above proves me wrong. Which got me to thinking how much wheels like that cost. Would you belive over $17,000(4) a set? I wonder what would a government that buys $600 hammers pay? And that doesn’t even include mounting and balancing. By the way, if you have never seen a 30″ tire mounted, check this out http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U-UzsVMEo9M.
Vespa GTV250
One of my recent favorite blog posts comes from Maureen O’Connor and describes a scene in Brooklyn where a woman is bending over to pick up after her dog when a youngster grabs her cell phone stolen and takes off. Out of nowhere a couple on a Vespa gave chase. The Vespa Vigilanties were described as anonymous heroes(4) “Chromed wheels shining like justice, the passengers chased down the bandit and retrieved the maiden’s phone.” Goodness, I really, really wish I had written that line – pure poetry. First off I had no idea Vespa had chrome wheels. Second, I had no idea chrome wheels represented justice (although I love the idea that having chrome wheels is right, moral and fair). It certainly would make my job easier. Especially the part about justice where failure to comply results in punishment(5). What’s your opinion? How long should a person be locked up for failing to buy chrome wheels?
Dodge Challenger 20" Chromtec
On the other hand there are also some not-so-flattering comments about our products posted online. If any of you have ever visited the Buy Extenze Male Enhancement website you would have found this posting by ‘zombiete’. First he asks if you would like to see some “cool male enhancement images” and then proceeds to show you a Dodge Challenger(6). Talk about bait and switch. He then proceeds to admit he has a “close relationship to cars” especially the way a “wheel feels against (his) fingertips”. Creepy enough for ya? If not, read on. Apparently he has been reading the research described above because he was interested in the wheels “despite the fact they are only there to help rude males get dumb females into their cars” thereby setting sexual equality back 50 years in the process. He concludes with the statement that our wheels are “wrong on so many levels”. Umm, sorry Mr. Zombiete, I think your post is wrong on every level.
Finally, a couple of years ago there was a major bust where the police found a shop that specialized in stolen wheels. The images posted on the local news’ online website showed a bunch of our Chromtec® wheels in their warehouse. So many in fact, I spent a few days wracking my brain to find some way to turn this into a positive. Thoughts of an advertising campaign along the lines of “4 out of 5 thieves prefer Chromtec® wheels” circled in my head for a few days until I realized I could not substantiate the claims (curses FTC). Last week I stumbled onto these not so subtle insults on a automotive forum(7) post about stolen Chromtec® wheels. “Bastards! First person I know of who got their chrome-clads stolen” “I was wondering how stealing those could possibly be worth their time” “They may have done you a small favor by stealing the stock cheapies” and ultimately “I never expected them to be attractive to thieves at all…” Ouch! Talk about kicking us while we are down! Just so you know, the owner later emailed me that he liked our wheels “Heck, I had over 70K miles on them and did not have any complaints…”
NEXT WEEK: Its bigger than you think! Nope, not a discussion related to an enhancement website, but an indepth discussion about how many vehicles are purchased with chrome wheels in North America. The number will probably surprise you.
Reference:
(1) http://buy-chrome-rims.com
(2) http://www.ftc.gov/bcp/edu/pubs/business/ecommerce
(3) http://www.wheelsnext.com Wheels at > $2,436 each and tires at $1,824
(4) http://gawker.com/5615089/brooklyns-vespa-vigilantes-are-cutest-crime+fighting-duo-in-america
(5) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Justice
(6) http://buyextenzemaleenhancement.com/blog/?p=297
(7) http://www.chargerforums.com
Special thanks to American Biker for the image of the Vespa Scooter with chrome wheels. Who knew? Make sure to visit them at www.americanbiker.biz if you are in the market for one.
Additional thanks to Projekt 503 for their picture of the Donk Limo. You can see their swag at http://www.projekt503.com.
Final thanks to Alan and the picture of his wheelless Charger. You can visit his site here http://forum.alanbestbuys.com/forumdisplay.php?13-Automotive and buy something from him to help ease his suffering.
The Chromtec Blog 
September 7, 2010 at 20:49
Darn the link on changing the 30″ wheel did not work – said The URL contained a malformed video ID. I was so looking forward to seeing that!
September 8, 2010 at 09:53
Link corrected.
September 19, 2010 at 18:45
Mounting that 30″ rim seemed like a lot of work. Perhaps they should consider getting one of these: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mG9-wAsjXLQ
September 14, 2010 at 10:52
Ummm, boys, you can delude yourselves as much as you want, but women do NOT care about wheels!
They just don’t.
Guys do…I’ve gone to auto shows and classic car shows with various guys (work colleagues, by and large) and a few women. And inevitably guys notice the wheels first off. Women tend (and I know I’m generalizing from a small sample) to notice color, badging, styling features.
But guys’ eyes go straight to the wheels.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but just be honest and admit you put on the snazzy wheels for yourself.
Do you notice women’s shoes? Unless you’re a fetishist, probably not. Same deal with wheels.
September 14, 2010 at 11:24
First off Helen, awesome name (do you drive a Mini Cooper?), thanks for the comment and I love the analogy with shoes. I hope you gathered that this week’s posting was pretty much tongue-in-cheek. I was doing my best to poke fun and those companies who market wheels “improperly” but perhaps it didn’t quite come across that way. If you haven’t seen last week’s post, for example, it discussed how important wheels were to the sale of new vehicles. Our research shows that wheels were more important to men than women. Maybe not every time, but in general you comment rings true.
September 19, 2010 at 18:29
Is it possible that simply more men than women are into cars, and that’s why it seems like women don’t notice wheels? It’s not that they don’t care about the wheels, it’s just that they don’t care about the cars in general. That may also explain why the studies show that the difference in importance of wheels between men and women is not that big. If the studies are conducted at automotive events, they’re already self-selecting the sub-population of women who have some interest in cars, and thus are more likely to notice the wheels.
And if that’s the case, then maybe guys who don dubs to get chicks are consciously self-selecting chicks who share their interest in cars. It’s like wearing a Pixies shirt out to the bar; 95% of women won’t give a crap or notice at all, but the one who does, well she’s a keeper.
September 20, 2010 at 08:49
Anyone who manages to slip a Pixies reference into an automotive blog is a winner in my book